just used?

am i just being used?
am i only their friend if i can give them things, download stuff for them, or follow them around like some damn slave?

i only write things here that comes from my heart. and the major thing now is:

I WANT TO DIE.

i wonder how others feel when they read this.
it's stupid, really.
i just wish i could disappear.

how am i supposed to know if they aren't just lying to me..?
if they aren't just playing some role?
are they honest?
are they really like this?
or is it me who is too nice?
too believing?
fooled by the world, to think it's something else?